Sunny days & Starry nights ... Wednesday, April 30, 2008
say i'm inflexible, say i'm unfeeling, say i'm self-ostracising, say i'm unrealistic, say i'm rigid, say i'm unfriendly, say i'm whatever ; i'm just strongly rooted by my principles.
I don't know what it is that's eating me, but something is. About all the leeways people choose to take ( lists a plethora of mental examples) , something is just not right. I don't disagree, but i simply c a n n o t agree. I try to counter argue my stand that it's no big deal and that this is how the practical world functions, and that i'm just overly concerned and opinionated, but then again, i can't get over it all. The whole issue of "cheating" to put it in a bad way, making things easier for yourself in a better light. I know, who doesn't take the less glamorous path at one time or another? I can't deny, i'm guilty yes . But when situations get to the more extreme, what's your conscience telling you? Is there a line to draw?
I do not have the answers to many of the questions i drew . But, i know what my stand is. Listen to you conscience. If you are certain that your actions do not deprive another but hurt your conscience, don't do it. If it is just a small deal about absence from a class or event, and you know nobody else is bothered with you, escape by all means. Why make it difficult for yourself? But at the end of it all, be answerable. If doing a certain something a certain way grants you a certain freedom, perhaps of time or from trouble, but something in you is saying no no and no , don't ignore it.
Perhaps doing things this way seem tedious and stupid, but this is what i call living life righteously and responsibly. There is always time for a líl' off the tangent fun, and that strikes the balance.
Human Relations
love languages- the click and hit between two people. As i learn somewhere sometime ago, different people have different love language. Love language is, in other words, your expression of love and how you feel loved. There're 5 essentially, words of affirmation, receiving gifts, acts of service, physical touch and quality time. As different people speak different love language, some people click instantly and some repel. And, that might aptly explain why certain people go on to form a clique and feel more at home with one another.
So yes, if you're feeling lonesome and all wired up with a group of people, it really is not that you have a social problem. It might simply be because of your contrasting way of communicating and your separate idea of how friends should work. Perhaps there is no direct link to love language, but i'll just like to say that we all have different expections of and from a relationship, and that you might feel more loved by a certain friend as you both share the same expression of love.
alright. i shall snap out of that serious and "level-headed" mood from here ...
it was fantastic being with those people and i had a taste of what it means to be a true blue clique. No superficiality, full (at least fully attempted) acceptance, pure and sincere joy for another with absolute zero jealousy, being there with no selfish desires and unnecessary entanglements or worries. It all felt right. and yes, that's how friends should be like. i really have them to thank for my napfa, where i felt the need to take refuge and sort out my indignation. .
& mrwee said this to me " Your best is an A " . Indeed.
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Tuesdays are the most wonderful as i get to hang out with bacteriophage and friends. The weekly girl talks have almost corrupted my mind (the eternal sunshine of the spotless mind?) but i enjoyed them all the same. Starting from galare half priced waffles, to cafe cartel, to hkcafe, and finally to b&j's freeconeday! Speaking of which, freeconeday yesterday was AWESOME! When we dropped off the bus, yl was so worried that we wouldn't make it in time for the ice cream that she made a beeline for the robinsons door. That then excited mel who went into a similar frenzy in locating the bj outlet. Desperation fully ëxemplified"when she ignored all issues about self-image and confronted two strangers for directions, exasperately. Imagine us dashing around the basement of raffles city before that, with muimui and i trying to catch up behind. Alas! We found the queue which led to the source of free ice cream! and oh my! Chocolate Therapy is gooooood beyond words! You can literary feel the rush when you bite into the chocolaty icy cream and it gives you this instant surrge of happiness. I couldn't stop exclaiming how good the ice cream was. It was pure pure pure indulgence i tell you. Round 2 was for strawberry which kinda paled in comparison. And i think we were really cheapskate as right after we've laid our hands on the first cone, we joined the queue again. whahahaha... what can i say.
oh and i just wanna share this really funny thing which mel cracked ! Apparently, she doesn't know her chinese terms well enough.
Me: shu (di 4 sheng) mei (di 3 sheng) shu mei shu mei ...
( repeats muimui's name in chinese)
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Mel ( asks muimui cluelessly) : Does that mean you're a virgin?
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Mui Mui ( looks incredulously at mel) : That's chu nv lah!
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Yiling: shu mei means demure lady. who would name their child virgin!
( briefly something to that effect and hopefully by the correct person)
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i burst out laughing and couldn't stop.
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In the same jolly tone,
Happy 18th Birthday Yiling!
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& Lazy afternoons ...
7:04 AM :D
Today was good. Today was fun. Tomorrow is another one.
