Love makes the World go round!

Sunny days & Starry nights ... Thursday, March 06, 2008

oh yeah, i'm back here again. guess i'm the free-est person around, with practically nothing to do. Called up heke at arnd 1145 today and she was havin her break which would only end at 1320, but she was locked in till 1230. so well, couldn't meet her for lunch. then i tried wrecking my brain to find someone to call, but to no avail. and i realized, yeah, i have a really small social circle. in cch i have probably made many acquaintances, but only a few to call buddies. here, it's not too good either. paws with a pathetically small member base and the now dysfunctional netball recre. why did it have its fate sealed just like that? this keeps happening to me, like the tennis team which was dismissed only after a year i joined. uh-huh. alright i've digressed. back to the topic bout my small social circle. so when i texted two buddies of mine, one kinda ignored my date and the other is just too busy. well, i guess everyone's busy except me. i have no h3, a cca that only occurs fortnightly, no sports cca, no nothing. perhaps i shold find some more commitments. but, i never liked commitments. oh man.

what more shall i type. oh yeah a line up of my hols activities- sat tns camp briefing, sun buffet lunch treat at plaza, mon&wed children camp, thur first aid camp and weekend nus open house. yupyup nicely done. i wanna schedule in some frisbee and cycling and badminton, but yeah, no one's free to entertain me. maybe i'll find some solo sports, like jogging or swimmin. i need an exercise regime.

btw it just occured to me how complex human relationship can be. it gets increasingly elusive. i don't know whats with this pessimistic view but that's what the facts are telling me. like this person who behaves down on earth durin one-to-one encounter but is high on airs when with a group of friends. maybe human beings are just too inferior to act confidently when alone. and group-time is the time to wield some power. yeah like a similar case with this person. is it some kind of social acceptance? the need of being part of a larger body? maybe. like you feel bigger and greater cos you know you'll be backed. eeek.nasty.
and there's this thing which i can't quite figure out. this person who kinda retreated into his/her shell after a verdict. is that shame to face yours friends? or is it relunctance to face the world? ohwell. i'll just let it be.
hmm,third. a person who's so fearful of being a social reject that he/she gave up his/her welfare for fear of public rejection. for the fear of being labelled "nerd" or oddball. maybe. personally i think this is insane.but i guess that's a common fear. some people are just too afraid of being outcasted that they choose to stop being themelf and put on a facade instead.
these are the things which i guess i wouldn't have seen if i haven't stepped foot in this place. this little society. and i prefer takin on the role of an outsider to being a part of this masquerade. it can be interesting to notice things like that and discover the mechanisms behind.

i've typed a lot already. hnmm... i'll see how things go tomorrow.

& Lazy afternoons ...
6:25 AM :D

Today was good. Today was fun. Tomorrow is another one.